Yay! Somebody is Lamer Than I am!

True story.  Saturdays are my day to run away and do whatever I feel like doing by myself.  I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE Sunday through Friday with my family, but boy oh boy do I love my Saturdays too.

So just what do I do with my Saturdays, you may be wondering.

Do I visit art museums, go to the movies, meet up with friends, shop till I drop?

No, no, no, no and no.

Most Saturday mornings you’ll find me at Jim’s having waffles, eggs and bacon.  I drink decaf by the potfull as I take advantage of their free WiFi – and I’m not paying bills or getting caught up on email, guys.  Usually I’m on Pinterest or playing games.   Is it weird to do Pinterest or play games on an iPad in public?  It feels really weird.

Why, why, why do I do it?  Because I can, okay.  Because I can.

Next most Saturdays, I venture further into Austin for shopping, a little time at the thrift stores, a little time at Wal-Mart, maybe Hobby Lobby (99% of the time it’s for things for the adorable kiddos I left at home).  I used to love shopping all day, but eventually my house got full of stuff that causes me more stress than pleasure, and money has always been tight, so I just don’t enjoy it like I used to.  So I finish shopping as quickly as I can and then I high tail it back to my neighborhood . . .

. . . neighborhood WHAT you ask?

. . . neighborhood coffee house, neighborhood YMCA, neighborhood bar?

No, no and no.

You can find me at my friendly neighborhood library for the entire afternoon most Saturdays.

Most of that time, you’ll find me on Pinterest.  My excuse is that I’m usually looking for homeschooling and speech ideas for Noah.  I mean, that sounds reasonable, doesn’t it?  But honestly, as my husband has reminded me on more than one occassion, following a curriculum and using what we already have would be sufficient.  So I’m hooked, I admit it.  Pinterest, blogging and my family are really the only competitors for my affections these days.

I wonder what all the sweet library ladies think when they see me come in week after week reserving a “research computer” for hours on end.  That’s what they call these silly machines they keep off in this room I’m typing this in.  I can literally fill an entire afternoon adding pins and posting blog entries.

I thought for sure I’d win the lamest way to spend a Saturday afternoon award, but guys, even that has been snatched from me.

Today I lost the title to an older woman who brought her mother into the “research computer room” to show her some real-time video.  She starts filling in her mom on what is going on in the video.  I thought, “hmmm, maybe a gymnastics tournament.”   The woman is ewwwing and ahhhhing over how well behaved a couple of them are being, and how they are all lined up and how cute they look.

Hmmm.  Gymnastics tournement?  I’m starting to get a sneaking suspicion at this point that not all of the subjects of the video are human.  Quite possibly canine, as a matter of fact.

Okay.  So maybe the woman’s kid is a dog trainer and they are having a national competition that she is checking up on.  She is definately very excited to see one or two of the participants.

Still can’t quite figure out exactly what is going on, so being my nosey self, I glance over at her computer.

It’s a dog kennel, guys.  Seriously, a dog kennel.  The dogs are doing NOTHING.  They are just roaming around a room.  No stupid pet tricks, no That’s Incredible footage.  They’re just sitting there.

Turns out this lady is visiting from California and she boarded her dogs in a doggie daycare that has video cameras so you can check up on your canine 24 hours a day.  She brought her mother all the way to the research room at the local library to show her live video feed of her dogs.  And they didn’t just watch for a minute or two.  They watched for like 15 minutes!  And then the woman went and got another woman to come watch with her.  This lady asked the other lady a couple times, “Are you sure I’m not boring you?

The other lady answered, “Oh, no.  I’d want to see video of my babies too.”  I detected a hint of insincerity there, but who knows.

So they watch for another 15 minutes or so, Lady Number 1 editorializing all of it.  “Oh, that’s just like Pookie (or whatever the dog’s name is), always under foot.  Look at the way he’s looking at the camera.  I think he must know it’s on.  He’s so funny.  Oh, he’s such a lap dog.  I tell you, that’s his favorite place to be.”

Okay, Lady, you win.  I surrender my title.


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